sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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