She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
