What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize
