so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Farmville is her only friend.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Randomize
