Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
