problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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