Can Purell be used as lube?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
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