3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
