Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
