awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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