Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
