we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
