...so i touched it.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
