used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
You left your underwear on the fireplace
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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