He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
