I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize