stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Randomize
