What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
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