I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
