Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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