i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
My day in three words: secret purse cake
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
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