The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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