You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Randomize
