i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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