Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Randomize