Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
