And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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