Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
