well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
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