every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
