it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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