I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
