A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Operation Purity has been aborted
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize