Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Randomize
