I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Randomize
