His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize
