Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
