You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
