I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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