nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
