LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
