I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
COCAINE IS GR8
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
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