I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
