so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
