Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
