I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
