I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Vodka?
Forever.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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