new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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