Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize