It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
