Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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