yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
